Know any good colon jokes?

I could kinda use a few right now. I don't wanna be a Debbie Downer but this seems like the best place to let everyone know what is going on, and well ... it IS part of the allbluezoo adventures. It's just not a fun adventure.

As you may or may not know (depending on how long you have been blessed with me in your life *wink*) I have crohn's disease. I was diagnosed in August of 2003 after a looooong horrific ordeal that I'd liken to childbirth only drug out over the course of 2 months. Since then I've been healthy, not healthy, really freakin' sick, damn near died, healthy again and most recently kinda in limbo of "remission" as we call it for a while and then a "flare" right around the corner. I've tried all the medications, diets, meditation, yoga - seriously I've done it all. I'm down to my last straw and after 8 years of battling my body, mind and soul are ready to have a life that doesn't revolve around where the nearest bathroom is and whether or not I can eat at an event or restaurant.

With that said, after all the medications I have taken the next step is surgery. What kind of surgery is the variable in it all right now. I currently have a colonoscopy scheduled for December 19 and my surgical team will be in attendance to evaluate the extent of the disease. I may only have to have a portion of my colon removed. I may end up having EVERYTHING taken out and be fitted with an ostomy and lots of other options in between. What I DO know is that even if I only have a portion of the colon removed now, eventually I will have to have everything removed - because you cannot cure crohn's disease. You can remove the diseased portion but it will manifest itself elsewhere and wreak havoc. Of course I'd like to prolong that part but if it is the opinion of the surgeons that I'm better off just going whole hog right from the beginning, then that is what we will do. The double whammy is that when you have had crohn's as long as I have the risk of colon and rectal cancer jumps exponentially. Of course I don't want to have to deal with that on top of it all and I pray that as of right now I am still cancer free. The last time I had a biopsy was October 2009 so I am a few months late having my follow up.

I have to say I am anxious about everything that lies ahead, but I have an eerie sense of peace knowing that there may be some normalcy in my life - in the life of my friend and most importantly in the life of my family. I want to be around for a long time to watch my babies grow into compassionate, caring, thoughtful, successful, handsome men - husbands - fathers. And I don't wanna do that from a hospital bed anymore. It isn't fair to them, to my husband, to my extended family to have to deal with all the crap that goes along with this disease.

So, there you have it! I do have a preliminary appointment with an ostomy nurse on Friday just to get an idea of what I may have in store, ask questions and hopefully be re-assured. Thank you all so much for your concern and care over these last 8 years - it hasn't been an easy road to be my friend and I am SO SO SO thankful and grateful for those of you who have stuck it out with me. I only hope that I am as good a friend to you as you are to me. Continue on with those prayers and positive thoughts, we'll sure be needing them in the weeks and months to come. Calming thoughts for my body and mind, prayers for the doctors that will watch over me, uplifting thoughts for my family as they try to balance their lives with the upheaval this will cause and many blessings upon Raymond that he will continue to be successful in his master's program even when dealing with me and all my baggage.

I'm not usually the person that asks for things - I don't often ask people to watch my kids unless it is a dire emergency. I'm a "I can do it" kind of girl. But I know with what is to come I am going to need to depend on my friends and family more than ever and I hope you want to continue along with me and be a part of my life forever, because I want that more than anything.